So, since I have started receiving emails asking if I am alive still, I guess it’s time to post. Please, don’t call the police. Or, um, my emergency contact. I am still here. Alive, and well…alive.
I had this poetic post written in my head, but then I fell asleep and forgot the whole thing, so you are stuck with a very unpoetical announcement.
I am Pregnant. With a capital “P”.
And as such, I am Sick. Sick with a capital “S”.
In my spare time, I sleep. And eat. And I sleep. I think I have gained six pounds so far, and I am only 10 weeks along.
Yesterday I had my ultrasound. Do you want to know what you should say to an ultrasound tech if you want to sound really dumb? You say, “Oh wow! There’s a baby in there.”
Yes, self. There is a baby in there.
I know I should post a picture of my ultrasound. That would require…effort. And, it’s six minutes past my bedtime already. Let’s just say it is super adorable, like a gummy bear. It was waving it’s little gummy bear arms, doing windmills. It was bouncing around. It was having a dance party or a P90X session, or something.
It is a very busy gummy bear.
Did I mention that I have been sick? I have snuck onto the computer from time to time and lurked faithfully on my favorite blogs. If I was feeling super ambitious, I might even write a comment. Usually I would just read though. So, now is the time for me to come out and say that the Lumberjack’s Wife blog, which I read faithfully, has been killing me.
Every post I have read has made me gag. First it was dead animals, then barf, then elk meat, then pig butchering. It has become an ultimate sport for me to click on her new posts. Thanks Taylor, for the excitement. So, if you all want to laugh and be grossed out, go read Taylor’s blog. The girlfriend has a Fear Factor-esque life…and she’s hilarious.
Was this post too whiny? Let me just announce that I am very, very excited about baby number three. I am super happy. I am enjoying my naps, and my crackers. I am daydreaming about the Second Trimester. I am trying to think of cute baby names.
I got nothing as far as baby names go. Pubert.
It is not cooperating.
I don’t want to torture everyone with pregnancy brain fueled blog posts.
Because of my absence, you have been spared from reading posts that dealt with memory foam mattresses.
I slept on one at my Mother-in-Law’s house. It makes you sink, lower, and lower, until you have made a mold of yourself. I made a mold of a slightly-out-of-shape-pregnant-lady-who-shouldn’t-be-showing-already-but-even-so-can’t-button-her-pants. I also dreamed that I was sleeping on a marshmallow.
See? Wasn’t that riveting?
Or, how about the post that I wrote one night when I had a chest cold. It was going to be titled, “How Come On Nights When You Cough So Hard You Puke A Little You Inevitably Ate Chili Beans For Dinner?”
I will spare you.
Now I have forgotten what my point is. So, I will try to write from time to time to time. I miss writing. I miss having the energy to wear makeup too. Oh, and I miss cleaning my house. Sort of.
I’ll be back. With gummy bear pictures and a happy face.
p.s. Today Derrick made dinner, he rocks the house AND the party.
Because raw meat…I can’t even go on…ewwww. Anyway he made meatballs from Pioneer Woman’s website. He was reading the directions and shouted, “Hey! I like this woman!”
To which I said, “So does everyone else, which is why she makes almost a million dollars blogging”.
To which he said, “You should be the Cow Lady or something! You should post recipes and stuff! Be like her!”
So, here is my recipe:
Go to Sonic. Buy me a Cherry Limeade drink. Bring it to me. Repeat as necessary.
Because, that’s what I’ve been cooking lately.
p.p.s. I am reading, but not writing. If I am writing, I am writing slightly incoherent stuff (Pubert?), so I will probably stink at responding. I am sorry. I am busy sleeping. And eating. And gagging when I read Lumberjack’s Wife. I do love reading everything you guys write. I really, really do.